I already told her that I see it coming. I can picture it so perfect in my mind already as I stand back and view the beauty in that room. All of the Christmas lights and decorations, the round tables and buzz of laughter and conversations. These moments where we all gather and celebrate. I use to lose myself in these times and race along in the moments and now it feels as though I sit back and just like to watch it all unfold.
Last year I skipped around and gave all of the squeezes and hello’s to everyone. I love it. It’s my favorite part. God has put so many amazing people in my life and when a ton of them happen to be all in one place at the same time, it’s just that much better. But I found myself overcome (more that I normally do and that’s saying a lot!) with just a flood of emotions. I am just so grateful for you all. Life has changed so much over the past few years and really it was changing all along. I just didn’t notice it as much and to be honest, I wanted a lot of my life to change. I was looking forward to the better job, getting things paid off, getting the little one out of diapers and getting more sleep at night.
Now I just hope it slows down as much as it can. Stop this train and with that the old John Mayer song takes me back to when we were first married and in our first apartment in good ol’ Spring Arbor, MI. But as life has come along more and more I’m feeling the severity of that line more deeply. How can we be so far through this life already? How can so many people I love and cherish be gone already?
I realized as my younger brother left the other night after Thanksgiving that there was this sudden panic in my heart when he drove out the driveway. Lord, please protect him. I have a lot of life yet to live and there’s a great many people I’m not ready to lose time with yet. So let us seize these moments. Let us gaze intently upon the beauty that surrounds us and make the most of every opportunity to say I love you. To make amends. To say what tomorrow maybe we won’t have the chance to. Don’t have any regrets.
Love them courageously. Live life courageously. Let God lead you courageously.